Unclear expectations often lead to disappointment.

It doesn’t matter if it’s a disappointment with a gift , a relational response or a worker’s performance, if you didn’t make your expectations clear, then you have no right to hold anyone else, but yourself, to blame for your disappointment in the results.

You didn’t make yourself clear and now you’re disappointed. Sure, you could easily argue that he or she should have known what you expected, but this only increases your frustration and negativity toward the person. Why not shake-off the blues about this one and determine that the next time the outcome is important to you with this person, you’ll assure that you make your desires clear.

As you set your expectations, remember that the more specific you are- the who, what, where, why and when, the less likely you are to suffer a “disappointment-headache.” Have the Excedrin ready if your instructions sound like this: ” Joe, I’d like your expense report ASAP.” or enjoy your weekend if you say this, ” Joe, I’m closing the books for the month next Monday. By 1 pm this Friday, I want your expense report completed and on my desk.”

For the sake of the empowerment of others, particularly those who report to you, I recommend focusing your expectations on measureable results and not actions or activities. In addition, if you can get their buy-in and understanding of the expectations on the front end, this will help assure that your days of disappointment are over.